My friend Grant's favourite sort of restaurant is one that no one else goes to. He likes nothing more than sitting in a giant, empty room with his long-suffering wife, free from all the annoyances that come with a crowd – such as ambience, social interaction, and a shared sense of community. Predictably, as soon as he finds a suitably under-patronised restaurant, it closes down – but presumably only after the owner has retrieved the very last piece of expired produce from the back of the about-to-be-repossessed fridge and served it up to Grant as “Tonight's Special”.
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